The Boss of You

[Steph is painting Maria's nails, and Maria wants to paint.]
Maria: Mom, when you get old am I gonna be the boss of you?
Mom: Sure
Maria: OK, good. Then I am going to paint your nails.

Bad Boys

Maria: I like bad boys, actually. I shouldn't.

Oh Crap!

Steph: Oh crap.
Maria: Oh crap. I just learned a new word!

I Take It All Back

[A week earlier, our neighbors Jill and George (that have a pool Maria loves) were over for a campfire, and when they left, Maria told George to not ever come over again. Today, after visiting with George for a while:]
Maria: One more thing...when I said you couldn't come over any more - I take it all back. You can come over any time, and I can come over to your house too.

Smiling At Me

[On the city bus, riding to the state fair]
Maria: Why is everybody smiling at me?

Against The Lawn

[Maria isn't going to bed, and keeps coming out of her room. She asks for the tenth time...]
Maria: Will you make my bed on the floor? [in our room]
Mom: Will you mow my lawn?
Maria: That's against the lawn!

A Big Flavor

Maria: Daddy, can I ask you a big flavor?

More Like Mommy

Maria [in the bathroom]: Why can't I stay up late like you?
Dad: Because you're still growing, and you only grow when you sleep.
Maria: How tall will I get before I stop growing? Will I be like you or like Mommy?
Dad: Probably more like Mommy.
[Maria goes into her room and closes the door. A few moments later, she opens the door and yells:]
Maria: Am I gonna get boobs?
Dad: Yup
Maria: Oh, OK. [closes door]

Your Chariot

Dad: Your chariot awaits you, dear.
Maria: I'm not a deer!

Was There a Chicken In It?

[Dad's car gets egged, and when we tell Maria about it, she asks:]
Maria: Was there a chicken in it?

A New Disney Princess

Dad: What movie do you want to watch?
Maria: I want Princess Diarrheas!

Math 'n Cheese

[In the morning, Maria didn't want to go to preschool...]
Maria: I don't want to go to school.
Dad: Do you think you know everything?
Maria: Yes
Dad: What's 2 x 2?
Maria: ...Mac 'n Cheese.